How Spoon Theory Changed My Outlook on Life
In my practice as a life coach, I’ve found that one of the most effective ways to help people cope with depression and anxiety is by using Spoon Theory.
Spoon Theory is a metaphor that illustrates how limited energy can affect daily life, especially for those dealing with mental health challenges.
Our bodies and minds are hardwired into one another. Hence, the balance between them is essential for our overall well-being.
If our overall thoughts are positive, we can draw energy from them. However, when they are mostly negative, they may have a detrimental draining effect on our physical and mental health.
So, it’s vital to be mindful of the thoughts that enter our minds.
Try to stay focused on what is good and uplifting.
Spoon Theory helps you learn how to gain control over these negative thoughts. So they don’t lead to depression, anxiety, and harmful addictions.
I’ve applied the principles of Spoon Theory to help authors facing writer’s block and entrepreneurs battling impostor syndrome, successfully guiding them to overcome their inner chaos.
This essay draws from my experience and may offer insights to others facing similar challenges
What is Spoon Theory?
Spoon Theory is a metaphor employed to explain the energy-draining effects of physical and psychological “circuit breakers.”
Christine Miserandino came up with this innovative concept of quantifying the impact and consequences of long-term illnesses and mental health problems on our well-being.
She was trying to explain her lupus diagnosis to a friend. Christine used spoons to show how different activities and tasks drained her energy, and how she had to carefully manage her energy levels to make it through the day.
The metaphor is based on the idea that each person has only a certain number of spoons (energy) to use for the day, and that any task or activity a person does requires the use of a spoon.
She used spoons to show how different activities and tasks drained her energy, and how she had to carefully manage her energy levels to make it through the day.
How does Spoon Theory work?
Every morning, it is as if each person is given several spoons. For most of us, they are unlimited.
Those of us who have the luxury of an unhindered life journey; do not have to manage our time with measuring spoons.
We go on living.
For those struggling with chronic illness or a mental health condition that stack of spoons is limited.
And every task requires a spoon.
If you’ve gotten out of bed, you’ve used up a spoon. Have you brushed your teeth? Another spoon. Did you go out and catch a train to commute to work? Another spoon.
This limitation of spoons makes you think carefully about where to spend them.
After all, you never know when you will have a crisis that will make you use too many spoons.
Eventually, if you spend them all before the end of the day, you may not be able to walk to your house and care for your loved ones.
Looking into various applications of Spoon Theory
So, how do you approach someone feeling depressed or struggling with anxiety? Is it the way they judge themselves? The way they respond to others? Is it as simple as they lack energy?
Could it be attributable to biological factors, such as genetic makeup, upbringing, and early experiences?
Or to none of those things?
That’s where the Spoon Theory comes in. It provides a framework that helps others share how they feel and at the same time set realistic goals.
A person can manage the trials of modern life and avoid burnout by understanding how much energy different activities require.
This can help people avoid overstretching themselves and “running out of spoons” before the end of the day.
How Spoon Theory can help manage mental health
Spoon Theory can be used to help manage mental health in a variety of ways. It is a powerful tool and can be used to help people understand and explain their energy levels and limitations to their loved ones and caretakers.
It promotes a better understanding of anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).
It can also be used to help develop effective coping mechanisms.
By understanding how much energy different activities require. We can develop strategies for managing our energy flow.
Thus reducing the impact of mental health issues and their negative energy fields on a person’s life.
Spoon Theory and depression
Spoon Theory is an effective tool to help understand and manage the energy-draining effects of depression.
This theory can be used to explain the symptoms of depression, such as fatigue, difficulty concentrating, and lack of motivation.
By understanding how much energy different activities require, a person can set realistic goals and expectations for themselves.
As hard as it is to have depression, This insight can help you feel that for the first time you have taken control of your life and are learning to live and say “no”.
Spoon Theory and anxiety
Spoon Theory can be used to explain the energy-draining effects of anxiety. It can be used to describe the symptoms of anxiety, such as difficulty concentrating, restlessness, and fatigue.
Spoon Theory can also be utilized to forge helpful methods of mitigating stress.
By determining what amount of energy is consumed for different actions we can look for solutions to conserve our energy and curb anxiety. This can aid in suppressing the impact tension has on our well-being.
Spoon Theory in the spectrum of chronic illness
Spoon Theory can be used to explain a variety of chronic conditions.
Spoon Theory can be used to describe the energy-draining effects of chronic illnesses, such as lupus, multiple sclerosis (MS), and fibromyalgia.
It helps explain the strain of chronic pain, physical disabilities, limited mobility, and fatigue.
It can also be used to clarify the symptoms of those conditions.
It can also help to develop strategies for conserving energy and managing their physical well-being.
By determining the amount of energy required for different activities, we can set realistic goals and objectives.
This can help us in preventing from over-stretching ourselves and running out of spoons before the day is done.
Spoon Theory and self-Care
Spoon Theory can be used to help develop effective self-care strategies. It helps to ensure that a person is taking care of themselves in a way that is sustainable and does not require them to use up all of their spoons in one day.
For instance, dealing with social pressure from those around you is not easy. However, there are times when you need to learn to say “no” to others and put yourself in the first place instead of spending another spoonful.
When you accept this reality and decide not to spend any more of your spoons on things that do not interest you or that were not essential to live and fulfill your daily routines.
You’ll come to understand how you have no energy to spare, so you need to choose very well where to spend it.
When you have nothing left in the tank you can simply say that your spoons have run out and everything is fine.
How to implement Spoon Theory into your life
The first step in implementing Spoon Theory into your life is to understand your energy levels and limitations.
This can be done by keeping a journal and tracking your energy levels throughout the day. This will help to understand how much energy different activities require and how to conserve energy.
The next step is to set realistic goals and expectations. This can be done using a Spoon Chart that keeps track of how much energy different activities require, thus helping you set realistic goals.
The final step is to develop effective coping mechanisms. Coping mechanisms are an essential part of managing stress and other mental health issues. At their core, coping mechanisms such as active mindfulness or Yoga provide unique techniques to help you save up those spoons.
Final thoughts
Spoon Theory is a metaphor that helps us to better understand the invisible side of the iceberg of our lives.
It is a life-changing perspective when we take into consideration how this theory can be applied in the lives of many people outside of lupus or diabetes.
I found in my life coaching practice that it may be the most accurate way of helping people feel understood and connected — and lay solid groundwork for healing.
People can not live well if they feel alone, so by showing empathy for the suffering of others, Spoon Theory is a way to help people relate to the amount of pain they are in and hopefully get it from a 10 to a 5 or even a 3.
This “visualization process” is how I make sure my coachees are getting close to where I want them and then further lead them back to a place where they can start living their best lives.
By getting it from a 10 to a 3 on the suffering scale, hopefully, people start feeling better and motivated to get in touch with me for more coping strategies.
There is much more work to be done in this area, and I would love to continue doing what I can to help make others feel better understood so we can start helping them heal more readily.
In the end, it is all about giving people an empathy check and showing them you care.
Read more:
I Didn’t Just Burn Out — People Die from Overwork
Did you know the Japanese have a word for work-related sudden death?medium.com
Living with Congestive Heart Failure and Atrial fibrillation has forced me to understand when my energy peaks and respect that I will get depleted in late afternoon. I also discovered power naps after meals in the heat of the day revitalizing. In summer dozing for twenty minutes on my patio is like sipping energy from the sun.
I approach every thing with the understanding that rush or pushing through and using up all my spoons will cause me to become so depleted I get stuck in bed for three days.
I don’t do things others can do for themselves. Worry is one of those things.
I write but, at a controlled rate.
Each day I make sure I do something that adds spoons of energy back. Reading things that I enjoy and Tai Chi are two of them. Praying is also a way to be loving and lovable. I don’t ask for anything - I clear my mind and let an image fill it that makes me smile. I sit with it and the grace that it is in my life.
Cuddling is also good for refilling my spoons.
Some days are days of sickness and fatigue - I let them just be what they are.
I think spoon theory is a great idea.
However when depressed some people are so numb they don’t have any reaction to awareness of their energy level. They have stopped being aware of their emotions on a conscious level. This is why learning to trust your anxiety as a signal of overwhelm is important. It’s wise to start using Spoon Theory to reapportion your use of energy in response to experiencing anxiety.